alright have you ever had one of those good days and then it gets ruined by ONE SENTANCE? That pissed me off so much that I wanted to chuck my monitor out the window and then dive after it with a knife and stab it repeatedly on the way down. Why is it that people I care about feel it is fucking coolbeans to toss me and my feelings aside like trash. No more, You don't care about me, then goodbye. I am not taking anymore bullshit from people that think I am a waste of their time. If you have a problem with me, Let's talk about it, not to my inbox on a email service, not to my away message, don't write me a letter, and don't give me the telephone game through someone else. Talk to me, if it has to be online, then talk to me when I am there, leave me a message saying to be online at a certain time. Just talk to me. Because if you don't then you obviously don't give a rats ass about whatever we have.

I am tired of all being Mr. Nice guy-please-walk-all-over-me-because-I-care.

maybe if more than one sentance of effort was used it wouldn't have been so bad. So if you want to patch this up Carrie, you talk to me, because I have tried to just talk with you, but all I get is a lifetime supply of: "yep". So, how much do I mean to you? I hope at least 5-10 minutes of IMs. I can only take so much before I need to feel I am worth something.

Anyway, to get my mind off of this enraging topic, I had an interesting dream. It consisted of myself and a partner on a business trip to some hideout place. but then the business trip went horribly wrong, and the train derailed after I got off and it was leaving. However this was no NORMAL derailing, oh no, it was caused by undead zombies! so basically at this point I knew what I had to do. I took my trusty bow and arrow and....RAN LIKE HELL. Me and my partner guy ran really far until we met with this crazy, wildwomen who was better at Archery than I. After that we got to some outpost and free'd some captives from their oppresive half-man-half goat (satyr?) guards. After that I took this magic gun with special bullets around, and after some movie like encounters, we ended up back at the train station, and had to fight the evil sorcerer and after all of that battling, I get to...you guessed it...wake up. So basically I got to sleep on and off during this ludacris dream.

Now is my attempt to stay positive, and have wishful thinking. I don't know what decisions people are going to make. all I know is that there will be adventure in any decision, and life will continue to have plenty of opportunities in any direction, and I look forward to venturing down those paths. ok enough philosophy speak. goodnight