Finally, blogger must have tanked it last night, was kinda sad.

Religion Religion Religion, if ya can't beat em, don't worry about it because there is no winning and losing.

have any of you ever layed your eyes upon someone or something that you knew you had to talk to? I have talked to a few of you about this one girl. She has red hair (last time I saw her) and is short, I have been trying to find her to just talk to this person, it is another one of those feelings that I got when I first met...well...pretty much any of you that consider me a friend.

it just is an odd feeling, I walk around campus from class to class and woner, does she know I am looking for her? can she feel she's being pursued to just be known by a complete stranger? It is just weird to think about all that. It isn't as if I feel anything more than curiosity towards this girl, but I just gotta know....just like Petey did with Sunshine (Remembuhr Teh Tietans...dur).

So there is a halloween party at Stephie's general dorm room tonight huh? And another one at Néve's. I think this calls for..*dum dum dum DUM!*(think: Ta, Ti Ti, Ta) Dave to be social!

let's see what the times bring, or what I can bring to the times!

Alright, well I can tell you one thing. Nutrition is the devil. and so is Discrete Math.

the day begins with me getting up at an astonishing 7:00am to go to that super hard programming class. After that I learn that yes, I still suck at Discrete math. bad test score just means I really really need to study more for this class.

So today Stephie and I studied for what? 5 hours? something like that for nutrition, but for about 3-4 of those hours, it was "sex chat" and random stuff like that. it was really nice, and those are the kind of moments that make me miss Carmel dorm. Seriously good times, and there is a party goin on tomorrow, but we'll see about that, considering I am feelin a bit sick, I need some foodage. And some sleepage...and some study tomorrow morning before the testage.

who even cares if protein is made of up amino acid chains held together by peptide bonds, no screw that. I would much rather talk about stories of people havin The Sex. either that or talk about food, because everyone knows food is fun.

I gotta sleep now, talk to you later blog

You know something that is super annoying? dropping the damn soap in the shower stalls and then when you pick it back up, the soap is all deformed and shit. There is nothing I like more than appropriatly shaped soap =D

Tonight was the Messiah concert. I really miss choral music. I am dying to do some here at BW, I just need to make it to the audition, freakin sing my lights out. Vive did well, Messiah is always fun, saw Dave Forni, he's look good, and so are all of the beautiful people at LHS.

I had a story to tell but I cannot remember it for the life of me!! damnit!!

oh well, more stories for tomorrow.

Big big props go out to Néve for that photoshop site. I have been having a lot of fun with it, and it definatly helps the web page development view of the teachers. I greatly appreciate it

it helps me make stuff like:

and


so you see, plenty of time to spare from making goofy buttons and little banners to play around with. and a couple backgrounds to play with too, you can see those at This site if you get board or just want to see some odd designs.

Anyway, I would like to iterate a point...going shopping for toothbrushes. aww man, that is a big choice. You have to choose what utensil you are going to use to clean your precious teeth for the next...what? 2-3 months? that is a big committment for a utensil! we're talkin big time action here. My toothbrush sees action at least 3 times a day. he has to be a big player. the one I bought is alright, not sure if the rookie is up to the game yet, but he is well on his way.

Also I find that my deoderant scent wasn't in the store where I was shopping. what the hell! I had to settle for another one, which I dunno if it will be acceptable, I may have to visit Target to get the "flavor" (hehe) I desire. I swear when companies have a good thing going, they always mess it up

If they get rid of my scent of Zest soap....oh man there is going to be a one man riot in Isle 13 baby.

Well I think now I should get some sleep, muscles gotta heal up for tomorrow's workout. Results of excercise = my best friend!

night

We got eggs, we know how to cook them....Bring it on in to Omletteville!!

Justin Timberlake was awesome on saturday night live, no butts about it! my *only* gripe is that the version he did of "Cry me a river" kinda sucked. It wasn't as good as the one on the soundtrack.

I have been trying to stay offline a little more than usual, to get some work done and focus on areas that I should be focusing on. I figure a good way to not cause trouble is to infact, no be around to do it.

Kev and I have been jammin here day after day, lately I have been downloading some Dane Cook skits, because he is awesome, and he makes my sides hurt...."Fuck bee's". Stand up comedians provide a really badass service. I mean come on, people who devote their job to making other people laugh

You know what THE hardest thing to deal with? Curiosity, and Imagination. These two evil sources of stress go unchecked. You know why?? because we make them! seriously, what more evil plot to destroy someone can you make? it is the Othello syndrome in its entirity. The easiest thing I have found to combat this sinister act, is to infact, be social! Think about it, you have an imagination, you imagine all sorts and kinds of different outcomes to different scenarios, with relationships, occupations, crushes, wants, desires, and even facts. 'Tis something truly powerful to distort facts. Think about it? how many times have you been told something, but yet, still waver about it? "Little Billy, there are no monsters in your closet", but why does little Billy check the closet each night before bed? What is he thinkin? THERE COULD BE A MONSTER IN THERE! he might as well wear a shirt saying "I got eated by a monster and all I got was this stupid t-shirt".

Imagination and Curiosity. two large words, two much weight on the conscience. Care to test yourself? snap yourself out of a daydream when you are looking at that blank page of math homework. What were you just thinking of? Well of course the answer is imaginary activities. I am no fantastic discoverer of this fact, I just realized it much more lately, and wonder how many of you have as well.

So if you ever find yourself as I have, in a world of dark scary creatures, or just someone you've been thinkin about more so that you should. Take a breath, blink a few times, look around, and go find a friend to hang with for awhile. it will (and this is for kevin)

Ease your Mind!

alright, after much debate lately, I have to post a fundamental (at least from what I've seen) rule of life's choices.

Risk vs. Reward

What chance are you willing to take, in order to gain whatever is what is in your sights? I don't take myself into account lately, because I have goofy sights, they aren't rational even to me. Otherwise, think about this. There is a guy/girl at a party, she catches your eye, what do you do? silently admire her from a distance? hope against hope that she notices and has the same reaction from you? do you take the chance of rejection, in order to increase your odds of a positive effect?

Risk vs. Reward, put the test of failure and success on those libra scales and see what you get. You can't win them all, but you can't win if you don't play!

alright, I guess that is as profound as I can become today, because I have to head on off to the lounges to study for a discrete math test in a few.

The past few days haven't been too shabby (haha). I did get to see the LHS play, which was very good. I am so proud of the cast and crew, they all do such a wonderful job. also I got to get creamed at Hi Ho Cherry-O, which happens to be, about the simplest board game for ages 4-8, stuffed to the rafters with choking hazards and little trinkets the cat can boot around the house. I also was so graciously invited to a birthday bowling celebration. It was Cosmic bowling, and it was really slick. I did pretty well considering the fact I was pushed and followed to the lane haha. It was an excellent time, thank you for inviting me ladies.

However the big bad green book of death, or as I like to call it DamnitMath, is pretty much staring me in the face. Which is kinda strange because that would mean it is levitating...and hey...wait...math book! put down that knife!

to be continued!.....

I just realized that today I used an analogy from the Gilmore Girls. What have I become! =)

Alright, well it seems that even if I am a little unkept in the head, myself and other people can still benefit from a good chat in the metroparks. Bri, I dunno if you read this, but if you do, feel free to stop by anytime. Kev and I have your back.

actually I think I am gonna head this one off and defer to my journal.

I'll do something more quality later today

I wish I knew where I belong. I am sure in time I will find my way, but right now this sure as hell a little tossed and turned.

Alright, facts: I want to take dance lessons this summer, I would love to give acting in movies a shot someday(from the ground up, I am no idealist), I want to see the world, because I have always wanted to and seeing what life is with like without computer games gives me hope to accomplish these goals. this goals are not to impress, they are to inspire myself to get my ass in gear and make something of my life. I am not about to be 35 years old in my parents house playing fucking Everquest.

so what else? you know what else? Music is a insane catalyst for meditation on a subject. Pick the right catalsyt, and Boom you have yourself some quality thinkin time.

this time isn't good however when you are driving a car. It gives you the autopilot feeling, but gotta pay attention to the red lights, I almost ran one today. I came to quick enough though, and no one was around..which was good for me.

I think it is about time for me to take a couple walks through the Fem Floors in this dorm, but not tonight.

ooooo, coincidence arrises...be back

"Cecila, you're breakin my heart, you're shakin my confidence daily". (I wish I saw them in concert, lucky bethie)

I swear this nutrition class is measured in some form of dog years. one hour in the class = seven hours on the mind. I like learning how to improve my health, but come on! hour and fourty minutes is a lot when there are other things on your mind. I find that learning about the habits of vegans grows more and more tiresome as I fade away into some other land of problems or adventure.

Honesty is the best policy. and there always that awesome feeling of happiness when someone feels the same way

"I have dreamed a dream, but now that dream has gone from me."

the things you hate to lose most are the respected privledges that were only lended to you.

The rest of my day today just involved me going to the bank, and picking up something from the party station, I still haven't decided what I want to be for halloween.

seriously though, I would love to be a power ranger!! rock on man, spandex is still in style right?!? we'll see.

I think I will save my goodtimes until tomorrow. Today brought nothing but lot of loss, and a few gains. (which balances out will remain to be seen)

Alright, so the week is on it's way, it is only wednesday, and a couple of large hard tests are approaching, on friday, and on monday.

This weekend was nice though. I did have a couple chances to hang out with Carly, and her boyfriend (and my buddy) Scott. and guess what!! Bethie didn't kill me! I mean that right there is cause for celebrating, because well...I still can! (celebrate...cause if I was dead I couldn't, uhh, right).

Carly and I had fun (as usual) for a few hours at coffee, and then I went to applebee's with Marie and Laura, that was good times, good ole LHS crew still finds each other everywhere, with me being the "old guy" now. Someday they will be the "old people" too, and THEN we'll see who has the last laugh..ha!...HAHA!

damn, I forgot I would still be older...
I am stoooooopid!

what can I say I guess, that little bouncing thing on your screen pretty much says it for me ;)

So the power went out at campus for a little while, that was kind of exciting, I was hoping it would stay out until night time. I really really want a "blackout day" to be instituted. I think we could all benefit from it. Why not? we all spend way too much time with electronics anyhow, I understand about the whole "no refridgeration", and the whole "can't blow dry my wet hair", and the whole "The T-rex will get out of his electrified area", but seriously, I think one night with those beautiful stars completely visible in the sky...would just be something to remind us (or at least me) what we take for granted.

and I know stars produce nothing we use on a daily bases, aside from horoscopes, but enjoy them for what they are...big balls of gas billions of miles away. If at any point in time you are confused, read the bouncing marquee about 5 inches up the screen.

anywho, after that side track. Csilla and I ended up hanging out Saturday, we watched some spongebob, then I had to go to work. Saturday night and sunday morning, both work. However! on the way to work on sunday morning, I had discovered that my resovoir tank of gas my dad put in the back for long trips (I think it was there for atlanta, either that or OSU/Wittenburg trip) had spilled in my truck. Well needless to say, it Reeked! and lemme tell you something I don't know what being high is like, but I garuntee It is probably something like smelling gas from the BW drive to work. I was nuts when I got into work, on my last day. My manager Matt probably thought I snorted something to celebrate my last day.

other than that, I declined going to a concert on sunday, due to weirdness, but had a pretty decent time talking to a lot of people. My weekend ended (literally) with a very surprising, but very welcome call at around midnight.

I wish I had better timing. I really should take after a few specific people.

Sometimes you eat the bear, and sometimes the bear eats you. Those are my only words of wisdom tonight

nothing quite has the healing power like a cold shower.

Do you ever have those days where you take a nap, and then wake up...but as soon as you wake up, a ton of bad vibe crushes you?

I took a nap not too long ago, and my dreams took shape to what was happening around me, for instance my roomie and his former roomate were watching the simpsons (it really happened) and then this girl(bri) and her bf showed up, and chatted. Really happened, they talked about poker (played poker in my dream) and then Katie Krumreig showed up and brought soup and we had a great time...then all of a sudden I was on a pirate ship...go figure

So, day one with no work, it is crazy, hard to believe I actually have freetime again. Gotta work on using it more wisely though.

anyway, showertime Later

Clay Rocks:
The Way

"...Theres something bout how you stay on my mind, theres something bout the way that I whisper your name when I'm asleep Oh
no. Maybe its the look you get in your eyes. Oh baby its the way that makes me feel to see you smile. And the reasons they
may change but what i'm feeling stays the same...."

and I think too much as it is, songs like this slay me.

So thus ends break, much satisfaction, no action. oh well

My last day of work was today, at least I went out not sucking, and I got to keep trinkets to prove I had infact worked there. It was actually pretty sad, I had a whole bunch of my little army of kids come by to say goodbye, and they really really want me to come back after I am done with my studies. These moments make me realize being a teacher must be incredibly hard. To see you favorite students move on, and to move yourself, leaving behind what you've known for so long.

But that is the beauty of change, Keep the memories, but pursue new (hopefully greater) horizons.

speaking of horizons I remember this great dream last night, it brought back old memories. I dreamt that I bought a Sega Genesis and a copy of Michael Jackson's Moonwalker, and Scott Young and I played it for like, 14 hours until we not only learned all the dances, but beat the entire game so bad the house imploded on us. How I wish it was us being silly 5th grade puppylovers for mary and bethie. haha! now those were some good times.

I have been doing a little more work on my dorky site, it is really nice, I like doing stuff like that. I mean my programming class is a pain in the ass, but I don't see how my web development class in the future could be so bad. I understand the concepts that will eventually be thrown at me, but this one class is a dream maker or breaker right here.

speaking of dreams, I think I am going to invent something that you sit on my shoulder and slaps punches me in the face when I start to daydream. Dreaming is such an amazing feeling, but the reality check sucks. when I am old, I would just love to sit with those I love and dream away....*music plays*. Seriously, that would be...a dream come true!

Alright well here is my super dorky page that I have to make for my class.

have a nice little giggle with this HA HA!

other than that, this should turn out to be a wonderful friday. good times for all. have a couple people I got to chat with last night...lemme tell ya...what an odd odd night.

I spoke with an old friend from 5th grade, Ashley Manning. it has been such a long time! but the convo was great, and she is lookin good from the pics she sent me, good times.

alright gotta shower, things to do, people to see, later!

Alright, thanks Kristyn! Clay's CD is really really good. I think he could make it better he was aloud to do whatever he wanted to with it. Like on American Idol, he was really bad ass becuase his touch made the songs so amazing. I think these songs will be unbelievable when he is on tour.

So let's see, what to do, should I work out first, and then take a shower and chill, or not work out today and do it tomorrow? nah, I think when 6:30 rolls around I will have to head on over to the Rec, gotta keep in shape, do some aerobics and strength building things.

one of the best feelings in the world is when you put forth the effort to go through with the harsh exercises and you see the results. it is a wonderful feeling.

Man I am messing with this webpage I have to make for one of my classes. lemme tell ya, we have to make everything we use, so this is gonna be one hilarious website. my skills with using the mouse to draw are pretty sad. when it get closer to being worth looking at, I will put up the link for some humor =D

anyway, 6:30 time for me to hit the gym! Later

Man, The Cubs lost.

oh well, poor fans, been 59 years without a national league championship game, and 96 years without a win. that is nuts man.

Anyway, Today was a good day, I enjoyed the time to myself, and it was great to actually get a little work done, and time to write in the journal, and just have a few unexpected, but very welcome, surprises

I dunno, I guess all I have to say about that, is make sure that when the good days come, to enjoy them. and if you don't, well then I am gonna come lookin for ya with a billy club and a pocket full of aggression and take you down!

goodnight

a little reminder why Karried is such a goddess of language

In his Darkness all he sees is you.
Your visage is pressed firmly into his memory
And refuses to leave.


In his Darkness all he smells is you.
Your own herbal concoction that he never knew the name of
Taunts his unforgiving nose.


In his Darkness all he hears is you
Boasting of the perfection
That you never could provide him.


His friends don't know him anymore.
They wonder what happened
To make him hide in the shadows.


They ask why he cannot see what you have done to him,
You, with your careless neglect, are responsible for his fall.


In his Darkness all he knows is you.
The love that you betrayed
Still rests on his favorite pedestal.


In his Darkness all he finds is you
To relieve him from the pain
That you brought to him in the first place.

If you can't relate then you haven't loved than lost.

Ha! I walked to the computer lab to start to do some computer homework, and I run into this really awesome (and pretty cute) girl from my Discrete Class last year. I thought I would never see her again

you know if there is some sort of fate or karmatic source in the world, I can definatly see how it works. I go to do something worthwhile, something good happens. I sit around in my room, and I dwell and crap and don't get any work done.

Glooorious Day!

ok back to work now, I am here for a reason

see ya

I just spend the last hour daydreaming and watching the end of Star Wars episode 1.

There ya go, it just goes to show that I don't use my time "wisely" (at least in accordance to school)

Man, I finally get some free time and how do I spend it? relaxing. I really should be kicking my ass to do some serious homeworking. and I think I will, but at least now right now.

You know that feeling when you finally find a song, and all of the lyrics are correct in a certain aspect of your life?

Simple plan usually fills that quite nicely, give that a shot and I bet you'll find a song.

There is this new beverage that Lipton came out with that is pretty good. It is "Brisk: Fruit Teazer". They are not too shabby at all, fruit flavored tea, the suttle neutrality of a tea texture with the citrus zing of the fruit flavor. not bad at all.

Anyhow, I am just think about what I should be doing now, I should probably go over to the computer lab and get to work on my computer project that I am oh so far behind on. either that or wait until later tonight to go there, because it won't be as full and I can probably do it in peace. That means I should either be studying Nutrition (no) or Discrete Math (good idea). I swear to god if I can pass Math this time I won't ever have to take another discrete course again. it will be magical. so on that note,

I will probably go and play a video game and be wasteful with my time...you know me!

later

oh blogger, I am sorry I have forsaken thee.

most of my free time has been devoured by either Work, or School. I mean sure that is normal, but it is mostly this and a little stress that has given me like...no time to do anythin!

School is getting tougher and touger, and I am quitting my job in order to give myself more time to kick back and pass some classes. how can I schedule for next semester if I can't pass this one! As far as things are going. I can only complain a little bit, but that is only because...well...to not complain is not human I guess. I just took a little time out of my work to play a video game, that's right, finally after 3 weeks a video game...and what did I pick? 3d Pinball baby. and got a 4million point score too.

yeah, who's the man? If anyone said me they are wrong, because I am a tool!

Anywho, I have kinda supplimented myself with a Journal now instead of a blog, since I can...pretty much write whatever I want without a chance of it being thrown back in my face. Unless the standard, someone reads it while I am away happens. But ya know I really don't see that, because my roomie Kev, is Kickass.

and Kickass doesn't read other people's Journals.

You know, I realized earlier today that...the 10foot pole market must be pretty broke. Becuase it always seems like no one will touch anything with one. Or is it...the 10 foot pole market is rockin' and everyone has one, just somethings suck so bad, they wouldn't put their precious 10 foot pole at risk by touching it?

it is all so confusing. I am gonna go, you can ponder that for a little...and join my fate I guess hehe

bye